In this episode you'll hear from Kurt Libby, co-creator of the Youth Ministry Tracker App.…
In the last post I gave you 20 expectations churches have from Youth Pastors on day one. Today I’m looking at the other side. You and I walk into a church with expectations of our own.
To be transparent, most are a fairy tale at best, and would be nearly impossible to obtain even with the best intentions. Nevertheless, I believe these are common Youth Pastor expectations for churches on day one:
1. Close relationship with the Senior Pastor
These do exist. They aren’t quite as rare as unicorns. However, there are a lot of factors in this, and you can certainly sabotage this as I have described in the post on why you struggle to get along with your pastor. One MAJOR factor with this is time. Close relationships just take time.
2. Intentional discipleship from the Senior Pastor
Having not walked with the weight of responsibilities of a Senior Pastor it is almost a guarantee you do not fully know the pressure your Senior Pastor feels. You may find yourself in a situation where this happens, but it is rare (this one IS as rare as unicorns).
Consider this…you’re pastor may not be the best person to disciple you.
3. Consistent encouragement and affirmation
This will not happen. Most people are overwhelmed and consumed with their own pace and pressure of life to stop long enough to consider your need for encouragement. Check out the post 10 Signs You Should Invest in Your Youth Pastor, you may want to share that one to give a slight “wink wink” to those around you. They probably won’t get the hint though.
4. Respect
I want to be seen as more than the “Youth Guy” and I’m sure you do too. This is attainable, but it takes work to overcome the stereotypes that exist.
5. Trust
You will have this if you stay long enough and work hard to prove yourself trustworthy. You will not have it on day one.
6. Resources others have
This one is a lie. No one has the resources they want. Even if you could have what others have, you’d still need and want more. You will never have enough resources so stop using this an excuse to be effective.
7. An office that isn’t a former (or current) closet
Enough said…
8. A higher budget
Want to know a secret? More budget doesn’t necessarily mean you are more effective.
Want to know another secret? You will never feel you have enough budget.
Want to know one more secret? You don’t need money to build solid relationships and invest in students.
Want to know something that’s not a secret? Having an adequate budget helps, but managing the budget you have is crucial.
9. Engaged parents
Having parents who are engaged in your ministry comes through building a culture over time. You must find ways to connect parents to your ministry. You must genuinely desire and work to partner with parents. It will happen, just not on day one.
10. More opportunities to preach
This will vary depending on your situation and context. There can be many reasons for this not happening more frequently and it can be frustrating. In the end however, remember why you are there. Take joy in teaching, preaching to, and leading your students.
So…
Is it even worth it? Are there things to love? Absolutely! In fact here are 100 reasons to love Youth Ministry!
I wonder where we get these unicorns from? Why do we have these expectations if they really do not exist. I know that you can have unrealistic physical or “unicorn” expectations from your spouse if you are exposing yourself to porn.. sorry to sound crass but where/what is the “ministry porn” that has us expecting these unicorns in our ministry??? What are we being exposed to that creates these expectations that are not nearly as harmful as porn, but that can create a similar tension and un-fullfillment?
@ dustin Hibner I think that we get these unrealistic expections from our lack of understanding of ministry as a whole Seminary might have tainted/ or at least color our perceptions of what ministry is like unless we have been in ministry for a while. I think our inability to see the big picture either in our church, communtiy or even our pastor’s life causes us to struggle with unrealisitic expectations. Finally from stories we hear about how other guys relate to their Sr. Pastor.
@dustin_hibner:disqus I think those are great questions and I think @disqus_BpxswfRru1:disqus is on point with his answers. We all have things that we recognize or feel we need. I don’t think that is wrong for us to do so. However, we also must realize that for those of us on staff, it will not be the same as those in the congregation who are being served “by the staff.” That isn’t to say that the staff are somehow better than the congregation or on a different level. I’m just saying that because we are leading we are out front, and when you are out front you are normally alone.
Many of the things we desire can be had. They take time to develop or must be found outside of the church we serve in (mentoring for example). It’s also important not to compare to others’ situations. There are always things you can’t and won’t see. It has been my experience that when we compare we always lose.